I'm on the precipice...

Before I had even left London, it was this mountain climb that I had in mind. This was the sole reason I brought walking boots with me, and will be the only time I use them this year. It's the reason I bought a backpack with cute little straps to take the weight off my shoulders. It's the reason I brought my nice woolly socks with me, because Lord knows I won't be needing them otherwise! Essentially, this was, in my mind, the main event. And it did not disappoint. 

Me, Hugo, Remy and five of our San Damiano boys met with Barney, Jason and the 25 members of the Monfort Crew in Bundu Tuhan, in the foothills of the mountain. Even at this point there was a buzz in the air. Everyone was up for it.

The next day, we rode up to the National Park, registered our names (Barney is now Barney James Reavley, and apparently the name Haswell just doesn't exist), and began our hike. To make it accessible to the public, they have some stairways you can use, but that takes nothing away from the strain you put on your legs. The humidity of the jungle meant we were all sweating in no time, but the more we ascended, the colder it became. When you stopped moving and your blood stopped flowing, the cold hit you like a wall, so breaks were short. A short break was needed when I managed to slip over and cut myself, because apparently I'm just too good for the staircase. I was the only one. I don't think I'll ever learn. 

The moments where there was a break in the jungle were just beautiful, mystical even. The clouds were blowing around us, moving faster than ever, and if they cleared you could just see endless rolling hills of thick, forbidding rainforest, the towering trees and clouds combining in dramatic fashion. 

The pre-climb picture, all fresh and raring to go!

Me, the boys and Jesus at the starting point

Our first stop for a picture as we found ourselves buried in the clouds

Me and the San Damiano boys taking a well-earned rest

The jungle we went through on our rise to the top

Black rocks and fog

Close to our destination, but still had to grab a picture first

We managed to conquer the climb to our lodging (about 3000m high), in under 4 hours, which was better than most. But what we achieved was nothing compared to the local Sherpa who conquered the climb in similar time, but with ridiculous weights on their back, including barrels of food for the kitchen and giant planks of wood for building. Needless to say their thighs were bigger than my head, and that's saying something! However, the sense of triumph and sheer joy as we reached the lodging was there for all to see. The beauty that surrounded us only supplemented our delight. I can safely say that what I felt was a pure and unrivaled happiness, a free and content state of mind. While the others rested, I went for a solo moment; me, the mountain, and "Greatest Day" by Take That, the perfect combo. I went for a solo clamber amongst the rocks and the jungle, until I was accompanied by Jason the Scout who joined me in ascending a little further to a beautiful spot overlooking the lodging area. By this point, we were tired and hungry, and so we went to demolish the all-you-can-eat buffet. Not one item of food was left untouched.

A very dramatic picture of the lodging we stayed in

An obligatory selfie to demonstrate my sheer delight in this moment

Not at all a staged pose, completely casual

Me having a special moment, surely the gimpiest kid on the mountain.

A view after some solo rock clambering

After some duo clambering with Jason the Scout, a Neil Buchanan Big Art Attack pose seemed like the right thing to do as the background is certainly picturesque.

After filling our faces with all sorts of nom, it was picture banter with the boys. Most of the boys had never experienced temperatures so low, so us white boys did what we had to do and proved our manliness. We took our tops off (good preparation for life at Newcastle University I feel). But we just had so much fun, and there was plenty of bonding going on. As the sun began to set, we got out the speakers and played your classic sunset songs whilst marveling at the majestic clouds who were seemingly trying to match the mountain for grandeur and splendour, and succeeding with the aid of the glowing, fading sun. When the sun eventually fell behind the mountain, it was time to rest as we had a big night ahead of us. It was hugs all round and off to bed for all of 4 hours.

The Monfort crew!

Me and Hugo having a ball

The classic winners fist up pose

I feel this one has an Uncle David feel to it (if you're not a Haswell, you need not worry about this caption, just enjoy the picture)

A bit more stunning mountain/cloud combo

Solid bit of cumulo nimbus going on here

Spectacular camera work if I say so myself

Yeah, I liked this picture a lot, so I took it twice

I like mountains, and I like clouds

Beastly sunset

We rose at half one in the morning to continue our climb- our aim being to beat the sun to the summit. There was a harsh wind blowing, and nobody had slept well, but spirits were still high. I managed to lose our crowd quite early on, with only Barney for company.. until I lost him as well. Along the way, someone's cap had blown away in the wind. Someone just behind me picked it up, and it was passed forward as far as me. For the remainder of the journey, as I ascended into the dark abyss alone, returning the hat to its owner became my mission. Whoever I passed, I would inquire as to whether any of them had lost a hat. Some could barely muster a reply as they were focusing so hard on their footing and keeping warm. They clearly didn't understand the gravitas of the situation. A poor man's head was freezing out there, and I had to find him. I caught up with one group of people and walked in close quarters with them for about 10 minutes. Then I realised it was Hugo, Jenny and a Monfort student! After cowering from the icy wind in a small crevasse like hobbits, we reached the summit together. As I stood on the peak, I called out to those around me regarding a lost cap. A reply came from the very foot of the summit, out of sight. I was told by others in closer quarters to pass the hat down to the man, and so I did. In doing so, the cold head I fought for throughout my mountain climb never saw his Saviour, nor my noble deeds recognised. But still, I was at the peak! 4095.2m in the air, and life was good. I found my San Damiano boys on the other side of the wind, seeking shelter amongst the rocks. I followed suit, and we huddled close; bitterly cold, shivering, but overcome with pride and joy. 

The summit! 4095.2m up, and it's fair to say I was feeling it, judging by my expression.

At the summit, all red-nosed, but all immensely satisfied

Soon, the millions of stars that dazzled in the night sky were over-shone by the dominant sun which peered above the mountain peak, warming the air ever so slightly, and shedding a bright, orange glint on the exquisite scenery that surrounded us, that we were a part of. With every turn, and every new angle, there was a fresh picture, a whole new landscape to capture. I was so camera happy, practically everyone had already started the descent to escape from the cold, while me, Barney and Alex from Monfort continued to take selfies and bask in the glory of nature. 

The beautiful moment when the sun broke over the mountain

The clouds forming another distant mountain...

It just seemed like the right thing to do, don't judge me!

Me and my main man Rex, with the "Monkey Head Rock" in the background

Cool dude

Mountains and clouds, you get the idea

Repetitive but beautiful

Eventually, we too thought it was time to head down, especially when we discovered the guides had been waiting for us all that time. But we still descended agonisingly slowly... but only agonising for the guides, we were loving it! We took in every moment, captured every view, and took the time to appreciate just how special our surroundings were, and how lucky we were to be there. After a brief stop at the lodging, me and Jason the Scout decided the best way to tackle the descent through the jungle was to run. So we did. Miraculously, I didn't fall over this time, and Jason did, which was great. We reached the bottom, and it took a while for us to realise just how tired we were. I was knackered. But my tiredness was still not the dominant   emotion; the overwhelming sense of achievement, of triumph, and of sheer ecstasy was still coursing through my veins, and has been ever since.

Me and Alex simply loving life

Barney and Alex taking a stroll down the mountain

Alex relaxing and enjoying the splendid scenery

Looks like that poor civilian is walking straight into a drop. I assure you he's not.

Sabah's beautiful Crocker Range, one that I'll be cycling through in July

A nightmare with a chocolate coating

The plan for last weekend seemed straight forward enough. Our Visas were soon to expire so we had to leave the country and get another 3 month "holiday" Visa when we returned. Simple. And it was; we were in and out of Brunei in a day, only stopping to admire Brunei's finest Ferry Terminal car park. Another country seen and ticked off the list as far as we were concerned, and our Visas were successfully renewed, so all was going swimmingly. We returned to the island of Labuan, the duty free haven from whence we came, and thus completed a quick, efficient and garguantuan second-back*. For me, the timing for visiting this island could not have been much worse. We are currently in Lenten season, and so I decided to maintain my annual giving up of chocolate. When I stepped off the ferry to find shop after shop of cheap chocolate, I could feel Satan's presence. I'm ashamed to say I caved somewhat; I let myself have a magnum on the basis that you don't call it chocolate, you call it ice cream, something I considered a vital technicality in my moment of weakness. I let myself down, but resisting the vast spectrum of chocolate on display took tremendous will-power. I've never seen so many flavours in my life, and I've been to Cadbury Land. Cadbury's Rocky Road, Cadbury's Snack, Cadbury's Top Deck, Cadbury's French Vanilla.. French Vanilla! And the list goes on (don't get me started on the Milka). Despite Satan stealing my soul when it came to the Magnum incident, I came good in the end and bought enough chocolate for all of the boys back at the hostel, a gesture so noble I think I warrant having Satan placing my soul back exactly where he found it.

We went to find a hostel, only to find most places had a full house or were just plain inadequate (could have guessed a hostel called Uncle Jack's would be dire; it didn't even have mattresses..). A man spotted our distress and showed us up to his "Luxury Room" hotel, which didn't even have a sign at the entrance, only a metallic stairway. We settled for it, and went out to make the most of the cheap alcohol (good job I didn't give that up for Lent!). We played pool, we sang Bohemian Rhapsody whilst surrounded by ladyboys, Hugo and Barney got lost, me and Jason made friends with the KFC staff, sat by the seafront and watched a film about cannibals. After a long search party disturbing many Labuan civilians to find Hugo, who turned out to be in the other room in the hotel and asleep, we crashed out. The next morning, the door was wide open, and Jason's camera and passport were gone. Brilliant. We went to the police station and sorted out the mess we found ourselves in. By doing so, we missed the ferry back so it was to be another night in Labuan. No drinking this time, but we watched the Manu game, all sharing one bed in a much nicer and secure hotel. Inevitably we missed the ferry again in the morning (I'm blaming access to Cartoon Network), so we had to grab a speed boat to the South of Sabah and bus it up to the capital instead. The speedboat almost made up for the woes we had experienced thus far as we had a lot of fun, and we thought a game of monopoly (yes, we now have monopoly) on the bus would have the same effect, although that only made us travel sick. But we made it, back to KK, back to normality, and back to watch Spurs beat Arsenal to Hugo's utter despair. Life was good again. With some cracking chocolate stashed away in my cupboard ready for Easter, and a moutain climb just round the corner, there's plenty to look forward to, and our turbulent second-back is now just a distant memory..

*second-back- leaving one place, only to return moments later, usually in embarrassing fashion or awkward circumstances

Brunei Car Park!

A common past time these days. This is me on a classic clean up.

We were just far too big in comparison, this was the only way.

The banter speed boat, made funny by the chunderful lady on our right...

Flashin' da cash

On a quest to find a hotel on the second night, I stumbled across a chair  made for cool guys like me. A bit too up-market to stay there though, so this was just another cherry on top of our second-back chocolate cake.